Here's 1 Reason You Shouldn't Open Your Marriage
It's not going to fix a relationship that's already broken.
I recently sent you the post: 2 Unconventional Ways to Solve a Sexless Marriage.
Basically, cheat or open it.
I think we can all agree that cheating is bad. Therefore, I suggested the partner who no longer wants sex give the other partner a “hall pass.”
But will opening your marriage fix it?
Not if the relationship is already broken.
My Husband and I Opened Our Marriage — It Failed Miserably
A couple of days ago, I published the piece: My Husband and I Opened Our Marriage — It Failed Miserably on Medium.
Why did our open marriage fail miserably?
We only opened our marriage because my husband cheated on me.
In short, our relationship was already broken.
I write:
We opened our marriage as this was my requirement for getting back together with my husband after our separation.
I had left him a year earlier when I found out he was cheating on me. We tried to live apart but had reconciled because of our children.
We didn’t want to break up the family. But I couldn’t commit to my husband again.
Not after he’d cheated on me.
And quite honestly, during the months I’d been living apart from my husband, I also discovered that I enjoyed having sex with other men.
I didn’t want to stop.
So we opened our marriage.
But the problem is, I fell in love with someone. This was an issue because my husband was fine with me sleeping with other men, just not falling in love with anyone else.
Obviously, that’s an issue with giving your partner a hall pass. While you might be cool with them having physical encounters with other people, they might develop emotions for someone else.
And that’s a risk if you’re not okay with that.
I’m just saying that as much as I might tout the open marriage as a solution to a sexless one, it’s not always the right fix.
Especially if your relationship is already on the rocks.
Sex-Starved, the Memoir
Did I tell you I’m writing a memoir? In case you didn’t know, I’m compiling stories that tell the tale of my sexual life after my divorce (and sexless marriage).
It’s called Sex-Starved, and to read the first chapter, please click on the link below.
You can read it for free on Wattpad.
Interview with writer Demeter Delune
Soon, I’ll be publishing an interview I did with Demeter Delune, a writer you may know from Medium and beyond. She told me about her own sexless marriage, which ultimately ended in divorce.
Curious to learn more about how someone who dedicates her life to writing about sex dealt with sexlessness in her relationship? I can assure you it will be a great read.
Not sure who Demeter is? Check out her own newsletter beforehand here on Substack: Discourse With Demeter.
That’s all for now. Shoot me a question if you’re curious about anything. To expedite my question-answering, please tip me on Ko-Fi or consider becoming a paying subscriber.